Them (aka Ils) by K-Fleet


Humor: 1
Blood: 2
Nudity: none
Minutes FF’ed thru: none
Overall rating: 2.5, based on a few choice scenes
Other: In French and Romanian with English subtitles.

Every since I saw the trailer several months ago, I highly anticipated seeing Dark Sky’s latest, Them. Lucky for me, it was the first to be shipped from Netflix on new release day.

The beginning started as many horror movies have, two people (a mother and daughter in this case) are traveling home at night, and something runs across the road, so they swerve and wreck their car by hitting a pole. Sounds familiar, huh? So, Mom gets out to check the engine, pops the hood, and disappears. Daughter gets out to find mom gone, is frightened by the sounds she hears, and gets back into the car (van, technically). She tries to call the police, but is put on hold, and while waiting, is terrorized by someone (or something) outside. She is then strangled by someone hiding in the back seat. All too familiar, I know.

Clementine, a teacher, receives a prank call, but doesn’t think much of it. She goes to bed, but is woken up in the middle of the night by disturbing noises. She then wakes her boyfriend, Lucas, who goes out to investigate. They see that someone has moved her car, and when Lucas tries to approach it, they drive off, only to return later to terrorize them.

First, their power is shut off, and flashlights are shined through the windows. The lights are then turned back on, and a game of cat and mouse ensues. Clem and Luke both get hurt, and in an attempt to flee, Clem tries to find a way out through the attic. What's scarier than someone chasing you through a room full of hanging drop cloths? Maybe a room full of mirrors, but the oodles of dangling plastic alone (and what might be hiding behind them) would make most shit their pants! The hoodie-wearing assailant finds her, but she fights him, and pushes him off a ledge, causing him to fall to his death.
Another one of “them,” sees his fallen soldier, and goes in a rage, chasing the couple out of the house and into the nearby woods. Clem makes it over a property fence and runs to find help, but Lucas’s leg is too banged up, so he’s left to hide (or left for dead).

She stumbles upon her car, and tries to flee, but is caught and taken to the tunnels. Lucas hears her screams and follows. He finds Clem held down by one of the guys, so he knocks him out, and a spectating younger boy offers to help them get away. As they climb the ladder to an upper level, the boy knocks Lucas off. Clem continues to make her way through the maze, and rushes toward a lit opening, but damn the luck, it's blocked off by metal bars and she’s caught again. The movie goes onto say that the police found the bodies of Lucas and Clem, and caught the murderers who were between the ages of 10 and 15.
This was quite a bit different than what I thought. Granted, I hadn’t done a lot of research, but did watch the trailer (as mentioned), and since Dark Sky usually has good movies, my expectations were high. I must say, aside from the drop cloth scene, and wanting to see the kid get his head bashed in by Clem with the big rock, which didn’t happen, I was utterly disappointed. I’m sure part of the allure is in not knowing why the kids were so demented, but I felt ripped off in not knowing, and the “They wouldn’t play (with us)” spiel just didn’t suffice. A much better movie of terroristic children is Children of the Corn or Who Can Kill a Child?.
I still have high hopes for Dark Sky, though, and Ricco the Mean Machine is patiently awaiting it’s turn.

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